19 days!!!

Can you believe that there are only 19 days until baby #2 is due to arrive??? I'm freaking out just a little!
19 days just doesn't seem like quite enough time to prepare--both physically and mentally. In a lot of ways, I'm really ready to be DONE with pregnancy. And in a lot of ways, I'm not ready--because I know how much work it is going to be once he arrives!
I'm also a little sad that I'm down to just a short time left with just Ryan. He is such a joy and I'm going to miss being able to give him all of my attention. (Although, I know that having a brother will be SO good for him!)

19 days.....

Not such a "break", although it does feel like spring!

We have been incredibly blessed this winter with Ryan's health. This is the first time since he was born, that we haven't met our insurance deductible in January! This is also the first winter that he hasn't had pneumonia. But, on Thursday last week, he got a pretty nasty cold. He's had a few colds this winter, but we've made it through without trips to the doctor or even having to start his asthma meds.
This one was different. We had a pretty rough Saturday and started Ryan on his asthma meds. Then, we had a REALLY rough Saturday night and his albuterol wasn't helping much. I called the doctor on Sunday and we ended up in the office on Monday. The doctor heard wheezing and we had to start him on a steroid medication. He's had these before and they always wreak havoc with his system.
This was no exception. Ryan pretty much threw a three hour tantrum on Tuesday morning--refusing to do anything, and everything I said caused a complete meltdown. Yesterday was a little better, and today a little worse.
Thank goodness for spring break! Either Jamie or I would have needed to be off work to take care of him for the last few days and that is a hard situation right now. Any days I take mean fewer paid days of maternity leave and any days that Jamie takes means fewer days he can take off after the baby is born.
So, I would definitely not classify this spring break as a "vacation," since tantrums, meltdowns and a cranky sick kid have made this week less than relaxing. But, if Ryan had to get sick, he did pick a good time!

Surrender

I surrender all
I surrender all
All to Thee my blessed Savior
I surrender all.

We sang that chorus in church this morning and it really made me think. First of all, I felt like a serious hypocrite singing it! Do I really surrender all?? No. Are there things that I am holding onto and refusing to give God control of? Yes. It was like a huge slap in the face this morning. I didn't want to sing those words, because I didn't want to give up my control on certain things.
How arrogant is that? Like I can do a better job than God? Do I think that as a flawed and sinful person, I can do a better job at controlling my life than the Creator of the Universe?

I know the answers to these questions--and I ultimately know in my head that God's way is the best and only way. But, my heart hangs onto these things, because I want things to go MY way, and I think I'm afraid that if I give it over to God then I won't get what I want.
Oh--it is hard to write those words! God is working in my heart and I need to do my part and listen and submit to HIS will, not mine.

Projects

We are in the midst of turning our guest room/catch-all room into a room for our new baby! The guest room closet had turned into a dumping ground for anything we didn't seem to have a spot for and cleaning it out has been quite a project! Seriously, the things you find! I really don't think that I need to keep a file box full of papers from Baptist Heritage that I took my sophomore or junior year in college! Sleeping bags and air mattresses have been moved to the garage and the most devastating part.....
is that Jamie and I now have to SHARE a closet. Okay, go ahead and laugh, but we have been blessed to have an extra bedroom in every place that we have lived and Jamie's closet has always been in that extra bedroom. I'm mourning the loss of my closet space, but I bit the bullet and moved most of Jamie's stuff into my closet today. Some organizing of my stuff is going to be required before the move can be completed, but I have really enjoyed having my own space! Now, the downside is that the closets in our house are NOT big, and cramming all our clothes into one closet is going to be a challenge.
I'll post pictures once the room is finished--right now, I would be WAY too embarrassed to share what my guest room currently looks like!

Quote of the Day

"Mommy, I'm sticking my lip out because we don't have anymore Cinnamon Toast Crunch."
says Ryan as he is pouting!
Glad he knows why!